The American Pledge of Appliance
December 2, 2006Let’s face it, the American Pledge of Allegiance…Great idea, rotten execution. Yet, it sounds so good we like to say it anyway.
The problem is, every time we recite it we end up lying through our teeth. I’ve decided to solve this problem, so I’ve come up with a new pledge which I would like to introduce to you all today.
I give you, the American Pledge of Appliance.
I pledge allegiance when I feel like it,
To the flag which I may now burn.
Of the Two Nations of America that switch places every 4-8 years,
And to the Fake Democracy for which it never stood,
Two Nations;
We are gods;
Affectible;
With stupidity and tolerance for all.
Just a Little Detour
November 4, 2006I’ve Conquered The Genies
October 31, 2006The Nature of Comedy
October 28, 2006Justice.
September 11, 2006The Cost of Honesty (Or, “Why I Never Lie and Why the Truth is Overrated”)
September 3, 2006With Liberty and Tolerance For All
August 6, 2006It’s not my fault I’m a pessimist.
July 18, 2006Sports for the Al Qaeda World
July 14, 2006The Truth About Sports
July 11, 2006 Next posts...Previous posts...