Hot Dog Confessions

For some unbeknownst reason, I eat a lot of hot dogs and polish sausages. When I tell people this, I always get the same predicable response of, “Do you know what’s in those??! If you knew, you’d never eat one again.”

I’m thinking the answer is ground up bits of animals that nobody would buy, correct? With some spices thrown in?

But let’s get serious, because it’s really not like you vegetarians have it any better…You know where those carrots come from, right? Heavily fertilized and most likely bug-repellent sprayed dirt. First of all, you do know what most fertilizer is, no? To put it lightly, it’s the stuff that our bodies were trying to flush down the toilet. So what do you vegetarians do? Why eat it, of course.

You’re right, that does sound extremely healthy and appetizing.

And now let’s think of what else is done with dirt. People walk on it, die on it, are buried and decompose in it. Pollution, of which the air is full of, is constantly in contact with this dirt. Nor is this dirt being watered with bottled Fuji water.

When we wash our clothes, what are we washing from them? Dirt. You know, the stuff we grow our food in.

In fact, I’d venture to say that there is nothing on this earth more dirty than that which is dirt.

So, to all you veggie lovers out there: You know what that’s grown in, right? I’ll bet if you knew, you’d never eat another one again.

15 thoughts on “Hot Dog Confessions”

  1. BRILLIANT ELLIOT! Only you forgot about organic crap. You know, packages of vegetable sporting the slogan “No pesticides!” and “Watered with the cleanest water!” and on and on. But yeah, you do have a good point.

  2. Thumbs up to you. After doing yard work today, and finding some extremely disgusting things in that dirt, i have to say that hot dogs are sounding a zillion times better than veggies.

  3. Your post was very much of absurdity, babble, balderdash, baloney, bananas, blather, bombast, bull, bunk, claptrap, craziness, drivel, fatuity, flightiness, folly, foolishness, fun, gab, gas, gibberish, giddiness, gobbledygook, hogwash*, hooey, hot air, imprudence, inanity, irrationality, jazz, jest, jive, and a joke. Please write your posts so they are more interesting to read (example: Christen’s ’s blog, “my rant on poop food”) So take to heart what I suggest and make it more interesting.

  4. I so didn’t write that. Joseph did it. I would have used proper punctuation (commas, you know). And plus, he didn’t finish the sentence that comes before the parentheses set.

    So there. 😛 Nice try, Jo.

  5. touche, ellie. But i still would rather eat dirt food that has been washed off than intestines. What can i say, we’re between a rock and a hard place. :-)

  6. Hahha I like you, you have an amazing point. Yeah that’s true most of the time when people are buying vegetable or fruit they are very kin in choosing the best looking without realizing how much pesticide that vegetable receive since it was young.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *